Sunday, February 1, 2009

c'est la vie

I know.. I know.. d title above is d heading of my blog..

Have u ever grow tired n bored of ur life? Feeling like a loser.. nothing seems to interest u.. sick n tired of d everyday routine of ur life.. hurmm.....
I do.. dunno y.. but.. lately.. I'm getting more n more bored with d life dat I have.. being used by other peeps... being ignored by peeps... peeps being nice to u just bcoz they want sumthing from u... peeps kept giving weird looks at u..

Well.. sumtimes.. I do feels like I'm just being sent to earth just to be bullied n used by others.. but hey... who'd want to be like dat??? seriously... no one wouldn't want dat sort of things happen to them.. I do dreams of being a great woman that contribute to d world..
I want to be a person that contribute towards building a better world in the future..

but.. lately.. I have kept wondering... n questions kept lingering in my head.. am I able to do it? am I destined to be great? am I a burdened to my parents? am I going to have a good future with myself now? am I going to be a doctor? could I do medic? am I going to just work after grad? am I going to further my studies? are my names going to be d nations pride? family's pride?

Well.. all of us r going to experience what I've experienced.. (I think so..)
Its just dat... I think there's nothing interesting happens in my life although I'm going to turn 22 dis nov.. everything.. seems soo normal..planned..

going to do a lil bit flashback here..
standard 6, UPSR.. got 5A's.. n my co-curiculum is quite OK (even though its not impressive.. I still have participated in sum activity).. I only managed to get into RK program in RPS n I'm grateful for dat.. d school have thought me a lot..
n then.. form 3.. PMR.. got 8A's.. although not impressive.. I am active with clubs n all dat (I'm just not interested in sports.. I still participate with d march on sports day).. I didnt get any offer either from MRSM or SBP.. so just stayed at RPS.. which I'm still grateful..
Then... form 5.. SPM.. got 9A's n a B... i applied for petronas, jpa, mara for furthering my studies overseas... n I didn't even get d call back for interview.. Now.. here.. I'm quite dissapointed.. as I've heard my mom n dad's talking.. dey want to see me furthering my studies overseas.. now I know I have dissapointed my parents.. quite devastated there..

Now.. It's like.. I'm soo used to dissapointment.. dat I'm not very positive when it comes to applying for sumthing..

dats why d french said.. C'est la vie! coz.. that's life! u have to deal with it no matter how hard it is..
I do believe in Karma.. Hoping for a better future for all d dissapointment..
I'm d kind of person who would do their best in not dissapointing other person.. coz.. I dunt want myself to be dissapointed like dat... even though I know.. I might going to end up being used by others...

trying my best to make others happy.. I know.. its not a very good habit... but.. wut to do..

just feeling a lil' down lately.. n here.. writing craps.. reminiscing bout wuts pass..

XOXO
MisZNiedA CulleN

2 comments:

eRmAbuTAng said...

"peeps gving weird lo0ks"
i know how u feel felt
total annoying!!

hey gurl r u ok?
i know life's kinda disspoiting sumtimes
but hey!
that's life
all ups n downs~
it give us less0n to learn for every occasion in life
keep us prepared wif bigger obstacle in life..
n may i add
mayb u didnt hv chance to go oversea bfore
but neva know in the future
allah's works this life in very suprising n pleasent ways :D
he always hv better plans for u
so0 cheer life
njoy ur life now~

misznieda said...

huhu.. sorry for d complaining.. thanx 4 everything dear