GazeRock!!!

one word..

effin' awesome!!!!

(haha.. its 2 words actually)

DIM scene

the GazettE Nameless Liberty Six Guns 2010 tokyo dome final

XOXO

In another life

This sucks..

Real bad..

XOXO

Glimpse

peoples talk..

peoples walk..

why can't peoples just make peace?

XOXO

Air Bubbles

Sometimes..

u couldn't help..

but wonders..

did a mere creature..

created..

just to make others happy..

and..

dissapears..

only to appear..

again..

when needed..

no matter..

what d mere creatures..

are feeling..

or doing..

d only thing it knows is..

they are happy..

when they can make others happy..

Peoples forget..

Peoples mocked..

Peoples take advantage of what they had..

Peoples manipulate others without realizing it..

Let us be a thoughtful person..

Let us takes a glimpse at others' suffering..

Let us view the world in a whole new perspective..

Just treat others as how u want to be treated by others..

XOXO

Hikkikomori

Avoidant Personality Disorder


People with avoidant personality disorder often consider themselves to be socially inept or personally unappealing and avoid social interaction for fear of being ridiculed, humiliated, rejected, or disliked. 

People with avoidant personality disorder are preoccupied with their own shortcomings and form relationships with others only if they believe they will not be rejected. Loss and rejection are so painful that these individuals will choose to be lonely rather than risk trying to connect with others.

• Hypersensitivity to rejection/criticism
• Self-imposed social isolation
• Extreme shyness or anxiety in social situations, though the person feels a strong desire for close relationships
• Avoids physical contact because it has been associated with an unpleasant or painful stimulus
• Feelings of inadequacy
• Severe low self-esteem
• Self-loathing
• Mistrust of others
• Emotional distancing related to intimacy
• Highly self-conscious
• Self-critical about their problems relating to others
• Problems in occupational functioning
• Lonely self-perception, although others may find the relationship with them meaningful
• Feeling inferior to others
• In some more extreme cases — agoraphobia
• Utilizes fantasy as a form of escapism and to interrupt painful thoughts

Strangely.. I possessed 11 of d characteristics mentioned above.. am I one of 'em?

XOXO

Psychiatry?

When u think dat u have done nothing..

a perfect statue..

and peoples keep on talking to u in anger..

its pretty damn exhausting..

XOXO

Feverish?

Ok..
today's marked d start of a new system..
implemented by my college..
but..
its quite hectic..
as everyone seems to be soo confused about d schedule and modules and all..
ended up.. doing clinical postings from 8am to 5pm..
its exhausting... mentally n physically..
franly speaking..
we were more tired of waiting..
instead of d postings..

all in all..
Tablo from Epik High release his 1st album as a solo artist..
and..
I simply lurves it..
well.. here's d tracklist:
1. Home (feat. Lee Sora)
2. It's Bad (feat. Jinsil)
3. Airbag (feat. Naul)
4. Tide (Scratch by DJ Friz)
5. From the Bottom (feat. Bumkey)

and...

from track 2..

d girl's voice is really haunting me..

as in a good way..

just simply lurves it.. 

XOXO

Say Kimchi!

Last night..

I found myself a new baby..

haha..

well.. 

I bought him..

n...

here he is!

Sony Cybershot DSC-HX100V

hehe.. well...

its not a DSLR..

I dont know much about photography..

neither am I a professional.. 

but..

I just think its cool.. :)

here are some shots taken..

alamak...!

class gonna starts tomorrow.. :(

XOXO

Gomen-ne

as I don't know what to write..

i'll keep posting some of the videos that I've kinda lurves... 

so.. dis is a japanese version of I'm Sorry by Gummy..

n for d 1st time.. 

i'll think dat d japanese version of a korean song is kinda good..

and in fact.. better..

well.. Gummy's d best in doing ballads..

n TOP is hot as hell! ;p 

(well.. a friend of mine who rarely says dat korean man are hot went on and says he's damn hot when she saw his pic in my iPod)

I'm Sorry by Gummy feat. TOP

XOXO

Remember The Urge

Oook.. dis particular song is actually older than the suicide circus..

I've forgot to make a post about it..

gomen-ne Uruha-san, ruki-kun, kai-sama, aoi-san to reita-kun!

Remember The Urge by The GazettE

XOXO

Suicide in a Circus?

The GazettE is back!

n as usual..

they're freakin' awesome..

Suicide Circus by The GazettE

XOXO

VK Disney? Sugoi!!

well..

a bunch of visual kei bands do remakes of disney's classic songs..

firts thought..

Wutta?!?!!?!

after actually hearing it..

its freakin' awesome man...

here's my personal favorite... 

plastic tree..

doing a cover of chim chim cherrey..

d tracklist:

1- NIGHTMARE - Fantasia [Fantasia]
2- NIGHTMARE - A Friend like me [Aladdin]
3- kawamura ryuuichi - Beauty and the Beast [Beauty and the Beast]
4- PENICILLIN - Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride [Lilo & Stitch]
5- Plastic Tree - Chim Chim Cher-ee [Mary Poppins]
6- Sadie - This is Halloween [Nightmare Before Christmas]
7- aoi - Can You Feel the Love Tonight [The Lion King]
8- THE KIDDIE - Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious [Mary Poppins]
9- NINJAMAN JAPAN - When You Wish Upon a Star [Pinocchio]
10- CASCADE - Heigh-Ho [Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs]
11- DASEIN - You'll be in My Heart [Brother Bear]

XOXO

Lumos

Dear book publishers...

If u guys produce a collector's edition with a nice adult cover for Harry Potter..

I would definitely buy it..

No matter how many Harry Potter's book i've already bought..

but please make d price a lil' reasonable..

i'm 24..

n i'm still a student.. 

i still live with my parents.. 

(well.. at least in a year i stay with my parents for about 1 month)

v (^-^) v

AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA...

2nd IA just stab me from d back.. hahaha

XOXO

Sixth Sense anyone?

Brown Eyed Girls is back!

well..

i just lurves this new song by them..

BTW.. they freakin' kill d song with d 3 parts high note done by Jea, Ga In n Narsha..

well.. some peoples said dat its just a whistling voice or something?

d heck..

i didn't study vocal..

but I just think dat its pretty awesome to be able to do that.. 

n damn.. they r HOT! :)

enjoy!

Sixth Sense by Brown Eyed Girls

XOXO

Shining Star

At a certain point of my life..

I would just wish..

dat I can be good at certain something..

Shine with certain something..

finding my niche..

rather than wishing being good at everything..

which I know..

is kind of impossible for me..

but somehow..

I didn't even get to be good at one thing..

rather than shining..

it flopped..

well..

let's just say..

I felt exactly d same as Clumsy Smurf..

XOXO

Asura Balbata

Holy %#*&!
Its already mid September...
Just tell me..
How couldn't d time passes more slowly..
instead it flies by..
just like a jet..
and without realising it..
my 2nd IA is in less than 2 weeks..
and as usual..
instead of studying..
I'm glued in front of my laptop.. doing everything..
except studying..

ok.. put 'em aside..
I am soooo in love with LeeSsang's Asura Balbata album..
d whole album is just EPIC
well..
people mocked me..
for being so obsessed in korean and japanese pop culture..
what can I do?
they said that d japanese and korean are just copying d americans..
well..
hello... there's hip-hop in every language..
there's RnB in every language..
there's Pop in every language..

just simply lurves d song and vid! :)

Turned off d TV - LeeSsang feat. Tasha & Kwon JungYeol of 10cm

Ook... I really have to force myself now..

I failed 2 of my paper in my 1st IA..

well.. I guess I'm not dat intelligent to be seating for an exam without studying..

ooooh... I forgot.. I am now... wearing.... wait for it... 

BRACES! (damn.. it really hurts! ;p)

and last but not least..

to whomever who still reads my crappy post..

let us change d world and be a better person! (I think I've been kinda outta my mind bcoz of d pain dis braces are giving me.. ;p)

XOXO

Merdeka Raya!

huwaaaaaaaaaaaa..

holiday over already!

anyway..

enjoy dis one.. a remake of american boy by kanye west.. 

done by malaysian..

Malaysian Boy 

XOXO

I dont care.. eh.. eh.. eh.. eh.. eh..

Superlike!

XOXO

Douchebag

Needed.. 

everything seems to be perfect..

Tossed..

everything seems to be insufficient..

Disgust..

everything seems to be at fault..

Hate..

everything seems to fade..

XOXO

Amor

They say dat..

to be respected by others..

u need to respect urself first..

to be liked by others..

u need to like urself first..

to be loved by others..

u need to love urself first..

I guess..

self hating is really eating me up.. 

inside out..

n a childhood's friend's quote popped up in my mind..

and she said..

u need to stop saying n being sorry all d time..

XOXO

Starry starry day?

Hey.. I just realised... 

my life's become so uneventful dat I can write nothing bout it in my blog..

compared to when I was back in Shah Alam..

nothing much happened..

its flat..

boring..

n damn exhausting..

no more midnight drive..

no more midnight mamak snacking..

no more stalkers' letter on my car.. (not for me laa off course.. for a friend who always sit beside me in my car when we went out)

no more driving in the traffic jam..

no more encounters with celebrities..

no more mocking d transgender.. (sorry.. I was young back then)

no more convoys..

no more discovering new places..

no more sweet weekend getaway..

no more driving for hours being lost..

no more driving straight faced in a pitch black road..

no more staying outside until early morning..

no more gigs..

no more concerts..

no more fest..

no more thrills..

Now..

When I'm not in d college or hospitals..

I'd be in my room..

cooped up in front of d computer..

most of d time watching videos..

sometimes reading novels..

sometimes sleeping..

rarely doing revision..

Sometimes went for shopping

(which I can finished within 3-4 hours.. where back in Shah Alam I can go and shopping for 12 hours straight.. coz there's nothing much here)

well... dats how routined I am now..

Damn.. 

I really need to start something new..

XOXO

UGLY

I seriously lurves this song..

d words in dis song..

dunt u feel dat.. 

dats wut we all have felt at some times in our life..

well.. I sure do..

2NE1- UGLY

*random: got dis one from a comment on d vid... UGLY= u gotta love yourself.. :)

XOXO

Heureux?

They say dat any relationships will become stronger as d years passed..

but..

why do I feel its kinda contradictory?

so near.. yet so far..

dat feels kinda true..

as d years passed by..

peoples seek faults..

and not forgiveness..

do we need to go back to school?

to make it all right?

XOXO

Je ne sais pas

If only I could..

I wanna run away..

from all of this..

begin anew..

XOXO

Espionage

If only there's a device in d world dat can read one's mind and heart..

XOXO

He-Who-Must-Not-be-Named

Oooo.. OH!

I forgot to make an entry about d final Harry Potter movie..

I was soo eager on d day d movie was released..

I was nauseous bcoz I was sooo excited.. ;p

it was good..

even though not as detailed as d book..

it was nice..

I nearly teared up watching Severus' story..

I grew up with Harry Potter..

it was indeed d event of d decade..

How I wish I can go to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter themepark in Florida..

XOXO

Kidsss

these lil' guys are freakin' adorable

XOXO

Spoiled Brat

Yes.. I agree that I am kinda pampered by my parents..

but a spoiled brat?!

well... HELL to the NO..

and to those who still thinks I'm one...

Try putting on my shoes and then u'll know how 'spoil' I am..

Don't just simply judge others..

XOXO

I Really Hope That This Is Not It

Peoples keep on using hadith to defend or accuse..

but..

I really hope.. 

dat my muslim brothers and sisters sit down.. and think..

is that what Islam teaches us?

to mock others..

to accuse others..

to hate each others..

to simply group others as the sinners?

Please let us not forget what Islam is really about..

and for the coming Ramadhan..

let us be merry and try to gained all dat we can from d holy month..

(I know dat I'm not qualified to talk about all the hukum and all... this is just my mere oppinion.. in dis world full of ambiguity..)

XOXO

Hate is a Strong Word

congratulations.. u guys made my day..

d b m a m f

d e b t l f m f w u g u i t

i d c i p s

i d e c t b i a r w a u b

i c c l

d e b t a f m f m w u r i t c 

b g w t m i f t g 

a y d w a d m r

f i g o w u c t m h

a i w b c t y h

beat it!

so.. in conclusion

STFU!

XOXO

Vengeance

I hold my grudge... 

no matter how petty it is..

XOXO

Plain White Ceiling

Somehow..

one cold night in Bangalore.. 

just pierce into a heart..

n d heart seems like its too tired to take it all.. 

n it might as well just stop beating..

n be as cold as d night..

XOXO

Cliche

Sometimes..

at some point of ur life..

u kind of wonder..

why did peoples bully..

why did peoples punish..

why did peoples judge..

why did peoples mock..

why did peoples step on others..

why did peoples look don upon others..

At sum point of my life..

I keep wondering..

do I deserve d punishing..

do I deserve d mockery..

do I deserve to be played..

am I dat stupid to be looked down upon by others..

am I dat Idle in others eyes..

am I dat insignificant..

am I dat easy to be fooled..

my head screamed no..

my heart screamed maybe..

my soul screamed yes..

might as well just go.. 

take a stake..

and run it through my heart..

*sunday morning rambling*

XOXO

마음

What my heart truly wishes for...

to be remembered..

to be appreciated..

to be missed when I'm no longer there..

not for money..

nor appearance..

just for myself..

sunsuhage nae ma-eum..

XOXO

Dearest Sunshine

as a medic student..

I am really bad at dealing with death..

even tho we haven't been dat close recently..

even tho I know.. Islam forbid us to mourn over death..

even tho I know i have to be stronger..

I wanna use my childhood's reasoning today..

Somehow.. My tears can't stop falling..

Lily.. may Allah bless u..

We will always remember ur warmness..

al-Fatihah

XOXO

Vortex

Sugoi ne gazetto!!!!

kakkoi!!!

coolness..

even tho.. d song didn't grow on me for d 1st time.. 

I'm sure it will grow on me.. :)

[PV] the GazettE - VORTEX (Full Version) [HDTV] by wonderful-life1989

Vortex - The GazettE

XOXO

Good Luck My Way

finally..

after such a long long long time..

laruku's back..

my Hyde-sama is back!

Ken, Tetsu n yukihiro is back dude!!

Good Luck My Way - l'Arc~en~Ciel

XOXO

Healthier?

Previously..

when d teachers or lecturers asked about how often did we workout in a week..

i would stumbled..

n felt really bad inside..

but now..

I can proudly say out loud..

dat..

I am working out for at least 30 minutes a day.. 5 days a week..

even though its not dat impressive nor strenuous..

at least..

now..

I'm not a full time couch potato..

yeay me! :)

XOXO

May--day?!

Dinner?
Secret Garden?
Gardening?
Flower?
nice.. but didn't manage to take lotsa pics...
ooo.. oh..
I looked fat in all d pics!!! (whose to blame? I'm fat from d beginning)

Luncheon?
Mighty Apes?
well.. d preparation is underway..
hope everythings gonna turn out great..

oo.. oh... Ayin's convo.. Congrats!

routine?
well.. its 6 weeks already..
anything new?
naa... same old same old..

Wedding bells?
Yana's!!!
my matriculation roomies...
huwaaa...
kinda lost contact with her..
informed bout her by diana..
huwaaaaaaaaa!!! can't go.. :(
to be frank.. I'm not soo surprised..
well.. she's d kind of girl where boys just attracted to her..
she's like a magnet to d boys..
congrats Yana!!!
(pls do gimme sum tips on how to be a magnet like u.. ;p)

Cheated?
huwaaa.. due to my eagerness to buy d tickets for raya..
ended up buying a return ticket bangalore-kl via air asia for RM1k+(d usual price is only 'bout RM700+)
n last week..
MAS have a 'daebak' offer..
return..
bangalore-kl..
RM880..
huwaaaaaa!!!!!!!!
MAS summore!!!!
(dh laa x pnh blk Malaysia landing kt KLIA)

Money?
dont even let me start...
my accounts getting thinner n thinner by day.. :(
(urghh.. if only my tummy can be thinner n thinner by day)

Nieda... stop being such a MONEY SPENDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u r not an HEIRESS or CHAEBOL!!!!

huwoo.. tomorrow's gonna be my casualty posting..

haha.. felt like being in d TV series ER (except dat real life is much more boring then in d TV)

XOXO

Vlogging on Saturday evening #3

ok.. enough fangirling with Kpop now!!

I just simply lurve dis song..

lurves Adelle..

well.. dis song might be old.. 

but d heck.. :)

urghh... if only i had her voice.. :)

Rolling in deep - Adele

XOXO

Vlogging on Saturday evening #2

Park Bom Daebak!!

haha.. dis is Park Bom's second solo..

She's from 2ne1 in case u r wondering..

just simply lurves d song n d set..

Dont Cry- Park Bom

love it.. love it.. love it..!!

XOXO
 

Vlogging on Saturday evening #1

2ne1 Daebak!!!

new single from 'em..

no autotunes.. 

no club mix..

just simply lurves it..

Lonely - 2NE1

soo in love with d song.. d hairdos.. n d outfits..

XOXO

L'ignorance

They might think I'm ignorant..

They might think I know nothing..

They might think I know nothing except about entertainment..

I haven't been studying in any prestigious boarding school..

I haven't been in any school activities..

I am only fluent in 2 languages..

I haven't attended any of d ohh soo great Unis..

I dont know anything about music notes and instruments..

I dont know how to cook lots of things..

I forgot how to drive a stick..

I'm bad at coordinating my action & thought..

I tend to avoid problems when they arise..

I dont know how to talk about politics..

I dont know how to talk about philosophy..

I only read fiction novels..
I dont know much about photography..

I always dissapoint others..

I dont know how to stand up for myself..

I only listen quietly when peoples talk about sumthing dat i dont quite agree with..

mom.. dad.. sorry for being such an asshole

*sigh*

frankly..
kinda tired listening..
keep listening..
while they talk like u dunt have any slightest idea about things..

When a heart break.. it does not break even..
it shatters..

XOXO

OCD

OCD..
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder..


It is an anxiety disorder in which people have unwanted and repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations 
(obsessions), or behaviors that make them feel driven to do something..


While we're at it...
I was reminded by my mom's saying while watching a documentary about OCD on d TV..
'when we think back... we all kinda have sum OCD behaviour in us aren't we?'
n to be frank... I think my mom's kinda true..


as for me..
I think I'm a lil' bit of everything..
well not everything..
I'm a lil' claustrophobic.. (I dont like sitting on a window seat or d middle seat in plane.. I prefer isle seat)
I'm a lil' perfectionists at sum things.. (I really dont like it when people use an iron spatula while cooking on a non-stick pan)
I'm a lil taken aback when things are not done my way..  (I'm not used to 'tumis'  when cooking 'masak lemak'.. n when i watched ppl 'tumis' it... I kinda felt dat its not gonna taste good..)
I smirked hearing about stuffs dat I find ridiculous (even though I know.. its not ridiculous to sum ppl)
n one thing dat I've trie so hard to held is..
I'm kinda ticked off when I heard sum words pronounced wrongly... n ended up telling off d correct way to pronounce d word..
I know its annoying..
but..
I've tried my best  to held it in...
hence...
I am so so so sorry about it.....

mian... chingu!
.
XOXO

Trouty Mouth

Me & my big mouth...

urghh.. 

how I wish i can stop talking crap..

how I wish I could stop mistakenly spilled everything out..

how I wish I could stop asking people annoying questions..

how I wish I could start talking wisely..

XOXO

Pests

just like a pests.. 

crawling around..

looking for something.. 

something dat can feed d soul..

but..

instead of soul.. 

disgusts is d one who came..

crushed..

killed..

like d world's gonna get much better..

without it..

XOXO